by Sarah Moore
A momma’s heart…that is what I have. A momma’s heart that has an insanely deep desire for her children to choose to follow Jesus as recorded in the book of Matthew (Then Jesus told his disciples, “If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross and follow me.” Matthew 16:24) and for her children to continue to grow in wisdom and stature and in favor with God and with man (Luke 2:52).
So what is my momma part in that process? What is my part as a teacher of children at Bethany Place?
For those that don’t know me or my background, I am a mother to 2 incredible kiddos…Landon (14 years old/9th grade) and Emery (10 years old/4th grade). I am also married to Travis (who is also incredible, but not the focus of this article 🙂). I was a 2nd grade public school teacher for 11 years in Powhatan County. For the past 10 years, I have been a reading specialist in Powhatan Public Schools serving children and teachers in grades K-5. At Bethany Place, I have taught 14 years as a children’s Sunday School teacher (ranging from preschool-8th grade) and have supported other children’s ministries over the years (Sports Camp, VBS, etc.)
All of these experiences combined with other life events, have shaped my view of discipling children. It is an ever-evolving task as outside forces shift, the age and experiences of the children grow and my own personal walk with God matures. I am in no way an expert in this area, but I was asked to provide my thoughts…so here they are:
Relationship Building…the time we invest in the relationship with the child we are discipling is incredibly important. Straight outta Gene’s pulpit (and Theodore Roosevelt’s mouth), “They will not care how much you know until they know how much you care.” Play with them, laugh with them, develop traditions with them, become interested in what interests them, sit and listen to what is going on in their world. When a child feels loved, liked, respected and heard, he/she will have a softer heart to listen and learn. Learn the characters in their favorite TV show, listen to the songs they have on their playlist, play the video game, make the craft, watch the youtuber, memorize the names, numbers and positions of their favorite athletes, understand the evolves and attacks of their favorite Pokemon cards…take the time to build the relationship.
Listening…in today’s fast-paced lifestyle, this is an action that has to be intentional. Consider the phrase, “do you want sausages or pearls?” A sausage would be a child that we are discipling that we just shove information, facts, and knowledge into…they are stuffed full. A pearl would be a child that we take the time to refine and create layers of deeper understanding. This type of discipleship requires a space for children to ask questions, to express doubt, to elaborate on their current perspective…it is in those moments that we can teach them exactly where their heart and mind are working. With my own children, I have found that these moments usually occur when I least expect…playing one-on-one basketball (and losing) after dinner, driving in the car on the way to school, creating a masterpiece out of pipecleaners and glitter on a Saturday morning…we must listen for these moments and be prepared to prioritize the moment (at the expense of what we may have planned) in the midst of our chaos.
Modeling…James Dobson wrote, “Children want to know what is most important to us. If we hope to instill within them a faith that will last a lifetime, they must see and feel our passion for God.” Study, serve, worship! The children are watching us. My daughter looked at me during worship one Sunday and asked why so many people looked unhappy. I looked around and I could not disagree…although I would argue that most people in the room were probably content, to a child it appeared to be a room full of many apathetic worshipers. I am certainly guilty too, other things on my mind and not preparing myself properly to enter into worship, but I never realized the impact my behavior had on the children that are watching. In order to disciple the next generation, we must model sincere prayer, disciplined Bible study, genuine worship, servant’s heart, repentance and a joy for the life that God has given us! Modeling authentic living as a saint who sins through every high and low allows our children to recognize a Christ-follower as who you are and not just something you do.
Teaching…Teach the Bible as truth, not as an isolated book…intertwine it with history, science, and archeological findings. It is not enough to simply say that they should believe because we believe. Normalize asking questions…How do we know Jesus really existed? How can you prove the resurrection? Can science and the Bible coexist and maintain credibility on both parts? Psalm 119:105states, Your Word is a lamp to my feet and a light to my path. We need to explicitly teach the Word so it can be a light for the path of our children in this darkening world. There are so many ways to teach the Bible to children…direct oral instruction, storybooks, videos, interactive notebooks, digital media…what is the best way to teach the Bible? The way that engages the children that you are teaching. 🙂
There is so much more to say about discipling children, and I am sure you have additional bits of wisdom that you have acquired through your experiences. Here are some final thoughts to ponder as we seek to disciple the children in our lives.
● Take care of ourselves (check in with ourselves, feed our souls, exercise, spend time with friends) Prioritize our time in God’s Word so we can grow, gain wisdom, make good decisions and model spiritual growth for our kids.
● Model commitment to church…worship side by side!
● Pray for our children’s spiritual health.
● Connect our children to other adults who have strong faith and character. It is important that the message is delivered from other people and not only us.
● Teach our children to seek after God independently…explicitly model how to have a personal time with God.
● Verbalize to our children how God is working in our own lives…Psalm 78:4 states, We will not hide them from their children, but tell to the coming generation the glorious deeds of the Lord, and his might, and the wonders that he has done.
As a church family, may we commit to encourage and support one another as we disciple the children that God places in our lives…I know this momma can always take as much encouragement and support as she can get! 🙂
For further reading, I recommend the book Why They Stay by Parr and Crites.